On His Birthday, LI Family Mourns Scout Killed By Drunk Driver | by Lisa Finn, Riverhead Patch

Thank you to Lisa Finn and the Riverhead Patch, who wrote a remembrance of Andrew on his 15th birthday, March 30, 2021.

On His Birthday, LI Family Mourns Scout Killed By Drunk Driver

Lisa Finn, Riverhead Patch

WADING RIVER, NY — If everything were different, Tuesday would have marked Andrew McMorris' 15th birthday. It would have been a day of laughter and photographs, a day for making memories. But instead of a party with dancing and his friends, his parents, Alisa and John, and sister Ariana commemorated the day by remembering their boy at his grave.

Andrew, of Wading River, died in 2018 when a drunk driver plowed into his Boy Scout troop while they were out hiking the Greenbelt Trail in Manorville with his Boy Scout Troop 161. He wsa 12. Several other scouts were severely injured as a result of the crash. In December 2019, a jury found the driver who hit Andrew, Thomas Murphy, 60, guilty on all counts.

Exactly two years to the day that Andrew was killed, justice was served — Murphy received the maximum sentence of eight and one-third to 25 years in prison.
But for Andrew's family, the lifetime of missing him is eternal.

"The loss is intense today as it was 911 days ago as we enter Andrew's 15th birthday, the third without him," Alisa said. "We are flooded by memories everywhere, that familiar lump in our throats returns, and the uncontrollable sadness takes over. It is a familiar feeling now, grief and despair that drives us back under the covers. It is at those moments that we think of Andrew's smile and it helps us take steps forward to navigate the abyss."

Despite the heavy grief, Alisa said she knows she has to keep going in the face of the unthinkable: "I often say that I want Andrew to recognize his mom from heaven and lying in bed is not where he would expect to find me. So we move forward and find meaning."

She said on his birthday, his family took solace in thinking of the things Andrew loved. His family, who created the Andrew McMorris Foundation to keep his bright light alive, announced a series of grants they are offering to K through 12 students that will be going live on the website this week.

"Andrew was a multi-talented young man who was full of life. He was an artist, musician, athlete, actor, Boy Scout, world traveler, soon-to-be pilot, and loyal friend," Alisa said. "His smile could light up a room. His ability to try new things and take risks will forever be respected, admired, and inspiring to all. We want other students to follow the legacy of Andrew and pursue their dreams."

To that end, the goal, Alisa said, is to "fuel the passion of the world in our youth by offering grants for Scouts, aspiring pilots and those pursuing the fine arts."

The deadline is June 1 for all three grants.

The Andrew McMorris Foundation also offers scholarships for graduating high school seniors,to inspire them to continue their studies after graduation.

To raise scholarship funds, a virtual "Finish the Painting" fundraiser will take place on Friday, April 9, where participants can finish a painting Andrew was working on when he died.

"You can use any supplies you have around the house and you can click on the link for a detailed supply list. If you have watercolor paints or even colored pencils around, you can still participate. The purpose of this class is to relax, enjoy, and create together," Alisa said.

Reflecting on the moment when her family's world was forever shattered, Alisa said: "When I think back to that day over 900 days ago, I become driven to stop it from happening. John and Andrew always had a themed costume for Halloween and I remember one where they dressed at Back to the Future characters, Doc and Marty — it is that one that strikes me the most. If I could time travel, what would I do? Keep Andrew home that day? I'm sure no parent would fault me for thinking of that one scenario. But I am left with the fact that a driver too intoxicated to drive still gets behind the wheel — and I want to stop this from happening to anyone else."

In those moments, Alisa said she wishes technology had been able to stop the nightmare that unfolded.

"That is where we need to fight for national legislation, so no family ever has to experience this horror," she said.

Alisa has worked with Mothers Against Drunk Driving and the national team to pass the Senate's Reduce Impaired Driving for Everyone Act; the legislation would mandate electronic monitoring systems in cars that can detect signs of distracted, impaired, or fatigued driving — and use sensors to determine if a person is under the influence and prevent them from moving.

"This technology already exists!" Alisa said.

The House's "Honoring Abbas Family Legacy to Terminate Drunk Driving Act" would also help to put the brakes on impaired driving, she said.

The McMorris family is asking New Yorkers to write United States Senators and support the bills.

"This has the potential to eliminate drunk driving in America, a crime that takes over 10,000 lives a year — the equivalent of a 737 airliner crashing once a week with no survivors. It is time that we get this technology into every vehicle on the road as standard equipment, just like airbags and seat belts."

Despite her work to create change, Alisa said the memory of her boy fills every moment— his aching absence echoes.

"Sleep escapes me as I wonder what you would look like today, what would you be thinking, what would you be saying," Andrew's mother wrote on Facebook last year on his birthday.

Her boy, she said, came into the world "fast and furious" at 10:25 a.m. at Southampton Hospital.

His gravestone was designed with a cross inside a heart, surrounded by hibiscus, the Hawaiian flowers Andrew loved, and the words, "Your wings were ready but our hearts were not."